D is for DEADBEAT Read online

  Way up at the front, I thought I spotted Barbara Daggett’s blonde head, but I didn’t see anyone else I knew. We sat down with a rustle of clothing and the scrape of metal chair legs. While Pastor Bowen, in a matte black suit, talked about what wretches we were, I stared at the brown vinyl tile floor and studied the staunch row of stained glass windows which depicted forms of spiritual torment that made me squirm. Already, I could feel a burgeoning urge to repent.

  I could see Daggett’s casket up by the altar, looking somehow like one of those boxes magicians use when they cut folk in half. I checked my program. We’d whipped through the opening prayer and the invocation, and now that we’d dispensed with the first hymn, we were apparently settling in for an energetic discourse on the temptations of the flesh, which put me in mind of the numerous and varied occasions on which I’d succumbed. That was entertaining.

  Pastor Bowen was in his sixties, balding, a small man with a tight round face, who looked like he would suffer from denture breath. He’d chosen as his subject matter a passage from Deuteronomy: “The Lord shall smite thee in the knees, and in the legs, with a sore botch that cannot be healed, from the sole of thy foot unto the top of thy head,” and I heard more on that subject than I thought possible without falling asleep. I was curious what he could find to say about John Daggett, whose transgressions were many and whose repentances were few, but he managed to tie Daggett’s passing into “He shall lend to thee, and thou shall not lend to him; he shall be the head, and thou shall be the tail,” and sailed right into an all-encompassing prayer.

  When we stood for the final hymn, I felt someone’s eyes on me and I looked over to spot Marilyn Smith two rows down, in the company of a man I assumed lo be her husband, Wayne. She was wearing red. I wondered if she would leap up and do a lap dance on the coffin lid. The congregation by now was really getting into the spirit of things and hosannas were being called out on all sides, accompanied by amens, huzzahs, and much rending and tearing of clothes. I wanted to excuse myself, but I didn’t dare. This was beginning to feel like soul-aerobics.

  The woman next to me began to sway, her eyes closed, while she hooted out an occasional “Yes, Lord.” I’m not given to this sort of orthodox public outburst and I commenced to edge my way to the door. I could see now that the minister, doing what looked like deltoid releases, was leading his merry band of church elders in the equivalent of a canonical conga line with Essie Daggett bringing up the rear.

  At the exit, I came face lo face with Billy Polo and his sister, Coral. He took me by the arm and pulled me aside as the service drew to a close behind me and people began to crowd through the door. Essie Daggett was wailing, nearly borne aloft like a football coach after a big win. Barbara Daggett and Eugene Nickerson had arranged themselves on either side, giving her what protection they could. For some reason, the other mourners were reaching out to touch and pal and grasp at Essie, as if her grief lent her healing powers.

  The pallbearers came last, pulling the coffin along on a rolling cart instead of toting it. None of the six of them appeared to be under sixty-five and Wynington-Blake may have worried that they’d collapse, or topple their cargo right out into the aisle. As it was, the cart seemed lo have one errant wheel which caused it lo meander, squeaking energetically. The coffin, as though with a will of its own, headed for the chairs first on one side and then the other. I could see the pallbearers struggle to maintain mournful expressions while correcting its course, dragging it up the aisle like a stubborn dog.

  I caught sight of Tony Gahan briefly, but he was gone again before I could speak to him. The hearse pulled up in front and the coffin was angled down the low steps and into the rear. Behind it, the limousine pulled up and Essie was helped into the back seat. She was wearing a black suit, with a broad-brimmed black straw hat, swathed in veiling. She looked more like a beekeeper than anything else. Slung by the Holy Spirit, I thought. Barbara Daggett wore a charcoal gray suit and black pumps, her two-toned eyes looking almost electric in the pale oval of her face. The rain was falling steadily and Mr. Sharonson was distributing big black umbrellas as people ducked off the porch and hurried to the parking lot.

  Cars were being started simultaneously in a rumble of exhaust fumes, gravel popping as we pulled out onto the frontage road and began the slow procession to the cemetery, maybe two miles away. Again, we parked in a long line, car doors slamming as we crossed the soggy grass. This was apparently a fairly new cemetery, with few trees – a wide flat field planted to an odd crop. The headstones were square cut and low, without any of the worn beauty of stone angels or granite lambs. The grounds were well kept, but consisted primarily of asphalt roadways winding among sections of burial plots that had apparently been sold “pre-need.” I wondered if cemeteries, like golf courses, had to be designed by experts for maximum aesthetic effect. This one felt like a cut-rate country club, low membership fees for the upstart dead. The rich and respectable were buried someplace else and John Daggett couldn’t possibly qualify for inclusion among them.

  Wynington-Blake had set up a canopy over the grave itself and, nearby, a second larger one with folding chairs arranged under it. No one seemed to know who was supposed to go where and there was a bit of milling around. Essie and Barbara Daggett were led into the big tent and placed in the front row, with Eugene Nickerson on one side and a fat woman on the other in a set of four folding chairs connected at the base. The back legs were already beginning to sink into the rain-softened soil, tilting the four of them backward at a slight angle. I had a brief image of them trapped like that, staring at the tent top, legs dangling, unable to right themselves again. Why is it that grief always seems edged with absurdity?

  I eased over to one side, under shelter, but remained standing. Most of the mourners appeared to be elderly and (perhaps) needed folding chairs more than I. It looked like the entire church membership had turned out in Essie Daggett’s behalf.

  Pastor Bowen had declined a raincoat and he stood now in the open air, rain collecting on his balding head, waiting patiently for everyone to get settled. At this range, I saw evidence of a hearing aid tucked into the tiny ear cave on his right. Idly, he fiddled with the device, keeping his expression benign so as not to call attention to himself. I wondered if the battery was shorting out from the damp. I could see him tap on the aid with his index finger, flinching then as though it had suddenly barked to life again.

  On the far side of the tent, I saw Marilyn and Wayne Smith, and behind them Tony Gahan, accompanied by his aunt Ramona. He looked like the perfect prep school gentleman in gray wool slacks, white shirt, navy blazer, rep tie. As though sensing that he was being watched, his eyes strayed to mine, his expression as empty as a robot’s. If he was expunging raw hate or an old sorrow, there was no sign of it. Billy Polo and his sister stood outside the tent in the rain, sharing an umbrella. Coral looked miserable. She was apparently still caught up in the throes of a cold, clutching a fistful of Kleenex. She belonged in bed with a flannel rag on her chest reeking of Vick’s Vaporub. Billy seemed restless, scanning the crowd with care. I followed his gaze, wondering if he was looking for someone in particular.

  “Dear friends,” the minister said in a powdery voice. “We are gathered here on the sad occasion of John Daggett’s death, to witness his return to the earth from which he was formed, to acknowledge his passing, to celebrate his entry into the presence of our Lord Jesus. John Daggett has left us. He is free now of the cares and worries of this life, free of sin, free of his burdens, free of blame…”

  From somewhere near the back, a woman hollered out “Yes, Lord!” and a second woman yelled out “Buulllshiit!” in just about the same tone. The minister, not hearing that well, apparently took both as spiritual punctuation marks, Biblical whoopees to incite him to greater eloquence. He raised his voice, closing his eyes as he began quoting admonitions against sin, filth, defiled flesh, lasciviousness, and corruption.

  “John Daggett was the biggest asshole who ever lived so get
it straight!” came the jeering voice again. Heads whipped around. Lovella had gotten to her feet near the back. The people turned to stare, their faces blank with amazement.

  She was drunk. She had the little bitty pink eyes that suggest some high-grade marijuana toked up in addition to the booze. Her left eye was still slightly puffy, but the bruising had lightened up to a mild yellow on that side and she looked more like she was suffering from an allergy than a rap up the side of the head from the dead man. Her hair was the same blonde bush I remembered, her mouth a slash of dark red. She’d been weeping copiously and her mascara was speckled under her lower lids like soot. Her skin was splotchy, her nose hot pink and running. For the occasion she’d chosen a black sequined cocktail dress, low cut. Her breasts looked almost transparent and bulged out like condoms inflated as a joke. I couldn’t tell if she was weeping out of rage or grief and I didn’t think this crowd was prepared to deal with either one.

  I was already headed toward the rear. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Billy Polo make a beeline toward her on the far side of the tent. The minister had figured out by now that she was not on his team and he shot a baffled look at Mr. Sharonson, who motioned the ushers to take charge. We all reached her just about at the same time. Billy grabbed her from behind, pinning her arms back. Lovella flung him off, kicking like a mule, yelling “Fuck-heads! You scum-sucking hypocrites!” One usher snagged her by the hair and the other took her feet. She shrieked and struggled as they carried her toward the road. I followed, glancing back briefly. Barbara Daggett was obscured by the mourners who’d stood up for a better look, but I saw that Marilyn Smith was loving every trashy minute of Lovella’s performance.

  By the time I reached Lovella, she was lying in the front seat of Billy Polo’s Chevrolet, hands covering her face as she wept. The doors were open on both sides of the car and Billy knelt by her head, shushing and soothing her, smoothing her rain-tangled hair. The two ushers exchanged a look, apparently satisfied that she was under control at that point. Billy bristled at their intrusion.

  “I got her, man. Just bug off. She’s cool.”

  Coral came around the car and stood behind him, holding the umbrella. She seemed embarrassed by Billy’s behavior, uncomfortable in the presence of Lovella’s excess. The three of them formed an odd unit and I got the distinct impression that the connection between them was more recent than Billy’d led me to believe.

  The graveside service, I gathered, was drawing to a close. From the tent came the thin, discordant voices of the mourners as they joined in an a cappella hymn. Lovella’s sobs had taken on the intensity of a child’s – artless, unselfconscious. Was she truly grieving for Daggett or was something else going on?

  “What’s the story, Billy?” I said.

  “No story,” he said gruffly.

  “Something’s going on. How’d she find out about his death? From you?”

  Billy laid his face against her hair, ignoring me.

  Coral shifted her gaze to mine. “He doesn’t know anything.”

  “How about you, Coral? You want to talk about it?” Billy shot her a warning look and she shook her head.

  Murmurs and activity from the tent. The crowd was breaking up and people were beginning to move toward us.

  “Watch your head. I’m closing the car doors,” Billy said to Lovella. He shut the door on the driver’s side and moved around the front to catch the door on the passenger side. He paused with his hand on the handle, waiting for her to pull her knees up to make clearance. Idly, he surveyed the mourners still huddled under the cover of the tent. As the crowd shifted, I saw his gaze flicker. “Who’s that?”

  He was looking at a small group formed by Ramona Westfall, Tony, and the Smiths. The three adults were talking while Tony, his hands in his pockets, passed his shoe over the rung of a folding chair, scraping the mud from the sole. Barbara Daggett was just behind him, in conversation with someone else. I identified everyone by name. I thought Wayne was the one who seemed to hold his attention, but I wasn’t positive. It might have been Marilyn.

  “How come the Westfalls showed up for this?”

  “Maybe the same reason you did.”

  “You don’t know why I came,” he said. He was agitated, jingling the car keys, his gaze drifting back to the mourners.

  “Maybe you’ll tell me one of these days.”

  His smirk said don’t count on it. He signaled to Coral and she got in the back seat. He got in the car and started it, pulling out then without a backwards glance.

  Chapter 18

  *

  Barbara Daggett invited me back to her mother’s house after the funeral, but I declined. I couldn’t handle another emotional circus act. After I’ve spent a certain amount of time in the company of others, I need an intermission anyway. I retreated to my office and sat there with the lights out. It was only 4:00, but dark clouds were massing again as though for attack. I slipped my shoes off and put my feet up, clutching my jacket around me for warmth. John Daggett was in the ground now and the world was moving on. I wondered what would happen if we left it at that. I didn’t think Barbara Daggett gave a damn about seeing justice done, whatever that consisted of. I hadn’t come up with much. I thought I was on the right track, but I wasn’t sure I really wanted an answer to the question Daggett’s death had posed. Maybe it was better to forget this one, turn it under again like top soil, worms and all. The cops didn’t consider it a homicide anyway and I knew I could talk Barbara Daggett out of pursuing the point. What was there to be gained? I wasn’t in the business of avenging Daggett’s death. Then what was I uneasy about? It was the only time in recent memory that I’d wanted to drop a case. Usually I’m dogged, but this time I wanted out. I think I could have talked myself into it if nothing else had occurred. As it happened, my phone rang about ten minutes later, nudging me into action again. I took my feet off the desk for form’s sake and picked up on the first ring. “Millhone.”

  A young-sounding man said hesitantly: “Is this the office or an answering service?”

  “The office.”

  “Is this Kinsey Millhone?”

  “Yes. Can I help you?”

  “Yeah, well my boss gave me this number. Mr. Donagle at the Spindrift Motel? He said you had some questions about Friday night. I think maybe I saw that guy you were asking about.”

  I reached for a lined yellow pad and a pen. “Great. I appreciate your getting in touch. Could you tell me your name first?”

  “Paul Fisk,” he said. “I read in the paper some guy drowned and it just sure seemed like an odd coincidence, but I didn’t know if I should say anything or not.”

  “You saw him Friday night?”

  “Well, I think it was him. This was about quarter of two, something like that. I’m on night desk and sometimes I step outside for some air, just to keep myself awake.” He paused and I could hear him shift gears. “This is confidential, isn’t it?”

  “Of course. Strictly between us. Why? Did your girlfriend stop by or something like that?”

  His laugh was nervous. “Naw, sometimes I smoke a little weed is all. Place gets boring at two A.M., so that’s how I get through. Get loaded and watch old black-and-white movies on this little TV I got. I hope you don’t have a problem with that.”

  “Hey, it’s your business, not mine. How long have you worked at the Spindrift?”

  “Just since March. It’s not a great job, but I don’t want to get fired. I’m trying to get myself out of debt and I need the bucks.”

  “I hear you,” I said. “Tell me about Friday night.”

  “Well, I was on the porch and this drunk went by. It was raining pretty hard so I didn’t get a real good look at him at the time, but when I saw the news, the age and stuff seemed pretty close.”

  “Did you see the picture of him by any chance?”

  “Just a glimpse on TV, but I wasn’t paying much attention so I couldn’t say for sure it was him. I guess I should have called the cops, but I didn’t h
ave anything much to report and I was afraid it’d come out about the… about that other stuff.”

  “What was he doing, the drunk?”

  “Nothing much. It was him and this girl. She had him by the arm. You know, kind of propped up. They were laughing like crazy, wandering all over the place on account of his being so screwed up. Alcohol’ll do that, you know. Bad stuff. Not like weed,” he said.

  I bypassed the sales pitch. “What about the woman? Did you get a good look at her?”

  “Not really. Not to describe.”

  “What about hair, clothing, things like that?”

  “I noticed some. She had these real spiky heels and a raincoat, a skirt, and let’s see… a shirt with this sweater over it. Like, what do you call ‘em, preppies wear.”

  “A crewneck?”

  “Yeah. Same color green as the skirt.”

  “You saw all that in the dark?”

  “It’s not that dark there,” he said. “There’s a streetlight right out front. The two of them fell down in a heap they were laughing so hard. She got up first and kind of looked down to see if her stockings were torn. He just lay there in a puddle on his back till she helped’ him up.”

  “Did they see you?”

  “I don’t think so. I was standing in the shadows of this overhang, keeping out of the wet. I never saw “em look my way.”

  “What happened after the fall?”

  “They just went on toward the marina.”

  “Did you hear them say anything?”

  “Not really. It sounded like she was teasing him about falling down, but other than that nothing in particular.”

  “Could they have had a car?”

  “I don’t think so. Anyway, not that I saw.”

  “What if they’d parked it in that municipal lot across the street?”

  “I guess they could have, but I don’t know why they’d walk to the marina in weather like that. Seems like if they had a car it’d be easier to drive and then park it down there.”